Super Boost Juice Recipe

I have been trying out some juice recipes recently and this one is my favourite just now, It's called the Super Boost juice because it gives me a boost of energy afterwards. 

 

I never fully appreciated juicing before, now I understand how beneficial it can be. It is such a quick and easy way to get so many nutrients and vitamins into our body. I have noticed a boost in my energy levels since juicing. It is a great way to add more vegetables and fruit into our diet. Even on a bad day when I am struggling for energy I can still manage to make a juice, as I know how much better I will feel afterwards. Juices can be very simple with just a few ingredients or can have a lot of ingredients. It's a good way to sneak in things you don't normally have. For me I would never eat pineapple normally but I enjoy it in this juice.

 

Ingredients:

Half a pineapple (with the skin removed)

3/4 Gala Apples

Celery Stick

Handful of Spinach

2 inch chunk of cucumber

Wedge of lime

Half an Avocado

Ice Cubes

Method:

Slice the Pineapple and Apples into smaller pieces that will easily fit into the juicer. Place all the ingredients apart from the avocado into the juicer.

You will also need a blender/smoothie maker.

Pour juice into blender, Squeeze the juice from the lime, Scoop the avocado out of the skin and add into the blender and add ice cubes. Blend on full power for 1 minute.

 I use the Philips viva juicer-hr183251-400w-green which was on offer for about £40. I love how it looks and is very simple to use. All the pieces come apart easily to clean as well. Any kind of juicer will work though you can find them from about £20 upwards.

It turns into this lovely green colour, which I was unsure about at first. However it tastes so good. The avocado adds a creaminess to it and the squeeze of lime juice add a kick.

It makes a litre of juice which I store in the fridge for a couple of days.

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Small Moments of Happiness

I have spent the last few months spending more time seeing my family and friends that I haven't spent much time with this last year when I have been feeling well enough. I managed to go to my aunties wedding which was a huge step for me. I wasn't sure how it would go, if I could even sit through the ceremony. I did last ( thankfully it was pretty quick). We went to the pub afterwards, and even though I wasn't drinking it felt nice to be more social. Unfortunately I felt the effect the day after with a severe migraine and felt very fatigued. To me it was worth the aftermath as it was a rare occasion were I was able to go out and socialise and spend some time with my family. I knew that if I had not have gone I would have to deal with feeling regretful. It was something that I knew for months that I wanted to go to, it was important for me to step out of my comfort zone and get comfortable in the uncomfortable.

My niece also turned 14 recently and we were invited round to my sisters for dinner. They live only 5 minutes away so I knew that if I was feeling unwell it was easy for me to go home when I wanted to. I was surprised though that I felt ok sitting with everyone for a couple of hours. It was really nice to watch my niece and nephew laugh and joke around with their friends. I was having a good time that I didn't think too much about how I was feeling and wanting to leave straight away. I think if you are doing something that you enjoy then you are not thinking about yourself and pay less attention to your symptoms.

It is too easy for me to give in to the illness and become more recluse, not wanting to jeopardise my current level of health. One of my biggest fears just now is my health deteriorating further again, to the point where I am bedridden, unable to even walk for 5 minutes. Any time I get a cold it brings me to tears because of the fear that I will be set back even further with my recovery. I know I need to stop thinking about going backwards and how unwell I have felt before. Each day brings new possibilities and the chance of change.

I am trying not to give in to this fear as much as I can. I accept that I am chronically ill and it is not something that will be cured my a magic pill or I will wake up one day and it will be gone. I have to decide how I want to live my life now even with this illness, it does not been that I have stopped living. My life might be considerably different now compared to a year ago, but I am still here and need to continue moving forward.

I want to be happy, which seems like the impossible sometimes when I feel so unwell. I am trying to find happiness in those around me and simple things that I enjoy doing. So that even on a day when I am feeling really unwell I can still find something to make me smile. Even if it is just watching a programme I like or playing with my dog. I hope to venture out and be more social even if I am not feeling great. I think a change of scenery would definitely to some good.

In life we should not take these small moments of happiness for granted. A lot of the time we can choose whether we are going to be happy. We can choose to see the good in people/life. We can choose to do things that we enjoy and will make us happy. We can choose to avoid people or things that are negative/stressful.

To me happiness is not one big thing but an accumulation of lots of small moments that we can treasure.

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How to Manage Anxiety, De-stress and Find the Calm

 

Everyone can benefit from finding the calm...

Learning how to relax is not just for those who feel anxious, stress can play a huge role in your daily life. Whether it is work related, money problems or just the train is crammed full of people and you find the stress levels starting to rise. Stress and anxiety can manifest physically causing a number of health problems which is another reason to find ways to manage it.

The first thing I want to talk about is mainly for those that are going through high levels of stress, anxiety, depression and are finding it difficult to cope and it may become overwhelming. To begin with it is very important that you speak to your doctor and tell them how your feeling. Don't feel embarrassed or feel that what your going through it is not important. You might be surprised by how understanding they are. They should give you the tools to help such as different websites to look at. In certain cases they will suggest antidepressants, this is entirely up to you if you decide you want to take them. I would suggest doing your research before making any decisions. I personally did not feel that I would benefit from them and with having CFS I did not think my body would cope well with the medication. My doctor gave me a list of local counselling services for me to contact and make an appointment. They all ran on a donation basis and the one I chose to go to started from £3 to £30 a session, so you can pay what your are comfortable with. Initially I was sceptical whether I would find counselling helpful. I thought how am I going to spend 50 minutes talking to this stranger. Well after I started opening up about what I was dealing with I found it really easy to chat away. I left the session smiling, feeling like a weight had been lifted. I decided that I wasn't going to spend all day every day worrying about my illness etc. Instead when a worrying thought came I would put it to one side and then when my weekly session came I would talk about it then. It has not cured my anxiety, however I have found that I'm not as stressed and worried all the time. I cannot tell you how important it is to have someone you can talk to about your problems and not to keep it all to yourself. You might be able to talk to a friend or family member open and honestly but it is not always easy. With a counsellor you can say exactly how your feeling and you won't be upsetting or offending anyone you care about. They are there to help not to judge you. Due to my health worsening I wasn't able to make the journey there anymore so had to stop going. Luckily I now see a private counsellor who lives nearby. I was also told about a counselling service over the phone which might be more convenient for some people and it is free. This is available through the NHS. The website is: http://www.nhs24.com/usefulresources/livinglife/

Something else that I have been practising for a few months is meditation. I tend to only meditate when I am feeling anxious at the minute. However it is something that with practice and dedication I would like to build up to doing it daily in order to see the full effects. There is a few free apps that you can download to your phone that has guided meditation sessions that are normally 5-10 minutes long. They go through the steps on how to meditate, such as your posture and breathing. The one I like to use is The Calm App because it has relaxing sounds that you play while you meditate. I sometimes just play the sounds when I can't get to sleep to help me relax. The other one which I have tried is Headspace, which is very straight forward and easy to use. It also depends on the persons voice guiding you, whether you actually find it relaxing to listen to. If your someone that gets stressed or anxious whilst travelling then you can easily put your headphones in and listen to the meditation. There are also plenty of videos on Youtube on meditation if you do not want to get an app. If you have trouble sleeping at night there is a kind of mindful meditation you can do while you lie in bed that I was told about from my counsellor where you scan your body. Lie with you arms by your side and close your eyes. Then starting with your feet, you tense your muscles while you take a deep breathe in, then when you breathe out relax your muscles. Repeat this 2/3 times then move up the body to your calves then thighs ect. Until you finish with relaxing your face muscles. If any part still feels tense go back and do it again. You might even find you drift off to sleep before you finish because your so relaxed. By continuing to meditate you will start to see that it comes with a lot of benefits. Some of these are:

I have recently been looking more into mindfulness which can be used whilst meditating but after continued practice should become a way of being. Mindfulness is about being in the moment and deliberately bringing your attention to this moment in time and not on worrying thoughts. It is not about keeping your mind clear of all thoughts but putting those worries aside when they come and refocussing your attention to the moment. For instance if you go for a mindful walk you notice every detail, such as the trees, cars, the sound of the wind and birds. You are finding the joy again in the life's simple offerings. Mindfulness carries a lot of the same benefits as meditation, including  an increase in compassion and gratitude. By slowing down and appreciating life everything we do can become mindful. I have been reading a book called The Little Book of Mindfulness 10 minutes a day to less stress, more peace by Dr Patrizia Collard recently. It has a lot of 5-10 minute exercises/tips on mindfulness and some lovely poems. It also talks about the body scan in more detail that I went over before. One thing that the author talks about is accepting what is. Which is something that I have had to do with CFS. But you have to do it with any illness you have, taking a mindful approach and accepting what is.

Another book which I would recommend is Calm: calm the mind, change the world by Michael Acton Smith. It is written by the same person who developed the Calm app. It is a beautifully visual book, full of colourful pictures. It again focuses on mindfulness and meditation and is interactive with a number of exercises to complete. One suggestion the book has it to start writing a journal daily. Which is something I have taken up over the last few months. It can be incredibly therapeutic and can reduce stress. Sometimes just writing down your thoughts and fears and be enough to help clear your head. Plus it will be nice to have something to look back on in years to come. The book has 3 questions that you can answer every day when you write your journal:

1. What made you feel calm today?

2. What are you grateful for?

3. What were three highlights of today?

Walking and being out in nature can be incredibly calming. When we walk we release endorphins which can relieve pain and increase positivity and relaxation. It is a good way to clear your head and relieve some stress. Even though I can't walk very far just now I still love just getting outside in the fresh air and take my dog with me. I listen to music and watch the world go by. I've become to know the people who live near me a lot better than I did before because now I pay more attention to what's happening around me.

Calm: calm the mind, change the world



Lastly I thought it was worth mentioning another book which I got recently. This one is not for reading as it is a colouring book for adults. I have heard a lot about them recently and they are also known for being therapeutic. You can buy mindfulness colouring books as well as Harry Potter and Vogue ones. I one I chose was Millie Marotta's Tropical Wonderland a colouring book adventure because it was full of flowers and animals. I quite happily sit for hours colouring in a picture and I love it. It honestly focuses my mind on what I'm doing instead of other worries. I find it very relaxing and I get a sense of accomplishment when I finally finish a picture. Another bonus is they are quite cheap and should take you a while to finish.

I hope that you will find some of my suggestions helpful in your search for finding the calm. Mindfulness and meditation can be applied to most aspects of your daily life.

 

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Let's Talk About Anxiety

I think I have always been a worrier even as a kid. I can be shy in social situations and have never been the most confident person. Whether I am just more likely to suffer with anxiety because of my genetics or past experiences I don't know. Everyone will experience some kind of anxiety which is normal. You might have an exam or a job interview and you feel stressed, worried, sick. This type of anxiety tends to only happen with situations like that but it doesn't stop you living your life. What I now suffer from is a generalised anxiety disorder. Which can cause me to feel anxious about almost anything. It is not just physiological symptoms of worry but there are also physical symptoms that can make it that much scarier and harder to manage. It affects almost every decision I make about my life.

General anxiety disorder (GED) is more common that you might think, with 1 in 25 people affected. In my opinion anxiety has gone from having a lot of stigma attached and no one really talking about it, to recently becoming more featured in social media. I think that it can sometimes be glamorised a bit even though more recognition is good, it should be done in a way that highlights what a terrible illness this is and no one would ever want to go through it instead of being seen as no big deal.

After I first became ill I was in a shopping centre and started feeling very shaky, weak and hot. I thought I was going to faint, my heart was racing and I couldn't breathe properly. I was so scared because I was by myself and didn't know what was happening. That was the first time I had a panic attack. It took me a while to realise that it was anxiety that caused me to feel this way.

Personally my anxiety can be triggered mainly in social situations. Even by leaving the house. I don't go anywhere far by myself, if it involves taking a bus then I need someone to come with me. I think this is because I fear having another panic attack. Every time I have had one it has been when I am by myself in public. It has knocked my confidence to go out now. If I know I have to go somewhere I start thinking "what if" and go through all the worst possible scenarios that could happen when I go out. So before I even go out I'm already sick with worrying. When I am out in public I have an irrational fear that people are looking at me and judging me.

When I am in this anxious state, my mind is over analysing everything and I can feel very scared. My heart rate will go up and my hands will shake. I'll start sweating and feel very nauseous. I basically want to get out of the situation I'm in very quickly. I hate feeling like I'm trapped and feel claustrophobic. I can't just relax and try and enjoy what I'm doing. I don't even have to be doing anything to feel anxious but the worries I have are still at the back of my mind. Worrying about the future or about my life before I became ill, feeling like you don't have any control over your life anymore. None of it does any good, all you have control over is the right now. What you can do in that moment to help yourself tomorrow.

You can feel very lonely at times, even if you have a great support system like me. Because unless you have experienced it yourself then it is difficult for someone to understand. Like CFS, anxiety can come on suddenly and it doesn't have a quick fix. A lot of people can really suffer but are too scared to seek the help they need. You don't have to do it alone! It is easy to become stuck in coping with anxiety but you don't have to just cope with it, you can make changes to help overcome it one day. Don't let it take over and control you.

CFS does make you more susceptible to be affected by it and anxiety also makes living with chronic fatigue more difficult. I wish I could live without anxiety in my life, and one day I will hopefully get there.

My doctor suggested this site on anxiety. I think it is very helpful if your looking to understand anxiety better: http://www.moodjuice.scot.nhs.uk/anxiety.asp

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Invisible Illness

Chronic Fatigue is an Invisible illness.

It is not the only one, for example, migraines, arthritis, depression, anxiety, digestive disorders and diabetes. People with these types of chronic conditions can look perfectly normal when on the inside they could be really suffering.

I have spoken about this frequently with other people as it can be one of the most frustrating parts of being unwell. No one obviously would want to look ill but it would make it easier for people to understand that you genuinely have an illness and could be in pain even if on the outside you look fine.

If you had been in an accident and broken a leg for instance; it is very obvious to other people that you might need help and understanding from those around you. For example, when I get on a bus and there is no seats free, No one is going to get up to give me there seat when I look like a healthy 24 year old. The reality is that standing up for more than 10 minutes is really difficult for me. I could try and ask someone for a seat and explain to them I have CFS but I don't think they would see me as being chronically ill.

A problem that I personally have when I got out in public is that I start to feel anxious because I feel like people are looking at me and they can tell I'm not feeling well. Which is actually irrational since if anyone does look at me they probably see a normal girl. It's a battle I have with myself one the one hand wanting to feel Invisible and not draw attention. On the other wanting more understanding from other people that I am genuinely ill.

Having an Invisible illness such as CFS can especially can get a negative reaction from even health professionals. When I first became ill every doctor I saw couldn't seem to care less by how terrible I felt because all the tests came back fine. I eventually changed surgeries and found a new doctor who is very understanding. It's so important to feel like your not crazy and to have someone else confirm how you feel.

It can also be very difficult for friends, family and work colleagues to understand how your feeling when you still look the same. In the beginning I dealt with a lot of negative reactions from a lot of people. Telling me I'm just depressed! I've actually lost friends because of this. They didn't want to take the time to understand what I was going through. Even now, my sister still can be insensitive and call me lazy. On the whole though, my friends and family have started to take the time to really listen to me and research more about CFS which has made a huge difference to me now I feel supported.

Unless you'd go through something similar then its really hard to relate to someone with an Invisible illness. Other people can still do there best to understand what your going through and be supportive. We don't need people to put us down telling us "its all in our head" , "take antidepressants", " your just lazy", " be more positive ". Come on! Try put yourself in that position where you feel the worst you have ever felt every day.

Instead things you should say are " is there anything I can do to help?", "I'm here whenever you need me", " I'm so sorry your going through this".

I think it's important that everyone takes the time not to judge others or wish they were more like someone else. Instead realise that the guy sitting next to you on the bus could be dealing with a chronic illness and to be more caring and understanding towards other people. You never know when you might be in a similar situation and wish someone would show you some kindness.

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What is CFS / My Symptoms

 

Chronic fatigue syndrome can also be referred to as M.E (myalgic encephalomyelitis)

CFS/M.E causes persistent fatigue that affects everyday life and doesn't go away with sleep or rest. It is an illness which affects a persons nervous system. CFS is a complex illness which can be suddenly triggered by a viral infection or can slowly develop over time. No one really knows what causes it.

I honestly thought there must be something seriously wrong me feel to feel this unwell. I have had a lot of blood tests done, an MRI, a heart monitor and an endoscopy. I have seen a general specialist, a ENT twice and a neurologist. When all the tests were coming back fine I actually felt disappointed. Which is horrible to want there to be something wrong with you. The thing is, not knowing what was wrong was even worse to deal with. How can you and others around you accept your actually really ill when there's no medical proof. I had all these symptoms and no answers. It wasn't until I dug deeper into CFS the dots started to connect and I found that my symptoms fit and my GP agreed.

It is not a straightforward illness with a cure, and it affects people differently. How I experience it could be similar or very different to you. As well as fatigue, other general features of CFS are:

•it lasts for 6 months or more

•it isn't caused by another medical condition

•it is not due to constant exertion

•it is not relieved by rest

•disrupts the patients normal life and stops them from functioning

Everyday I feel like crap to put it plainly. I'm exhausted from the minute I wake up in the morning and for the rest of the day I have very little energy. I go for 2/3 short 10 minute walks a day just now but that's about all I can manage. Everyday I have a headache which can get worse and develop into a migraine occasionally. Some people describe having brain fog. For me I feel quit dizzy and there a lot of pressure in my head. My vision is also affected. I feel like I am not seeing in HD and everything's out of focus. It may be because of the dizziness but I also feel nauseous and have to take sickness pills everyday otherwise I probably will vomit. 

I have noticed is that my senses are more heightened. Mainly I am very sensitive towards sounds. If I am somewhere in public the sounds around start getting louder and louder and its the feeling you get like nails on a chalkboard. I also can't regulate my temperature very well I get hot very easily even when other people are freezing, to the annoyance of my family as I hate the heating being on. I also get really bad pains in my neck, shoulders and back everyday. Before I got CFS I had problems with IBS and they have gotten worse now, I've recently been getting heartburn and acid which has been so horrible. Another symptom which is quite a scary one is that I can get chest pains and flutters. The doctor says it is post viral inflamation. I have found that if I don't eat every few hours I feel lightheaded and shaky and my heartrate goes up. It's as if I have low blood sugar but my blood sugar is fine. Haven't found any explanation for this yet, it could just be me that experiences it.

Worth mentioning that I can have difficulty concentrating after a while. When I am reading/writing, after 20 minutes normally I have to stop. I know I am not the best writer but I enjoy it and I might forget what I am trying to say half way through a post but I hope it is still ok for you guys reading it.

Something I haven't mentioned yet is that I also suffer quite badly for anxiety now. It started after I became unwell and has caused me to have panic attacks before. I'm going to talk about this more in a separate post though.

I hope this has given you more of an insight into what CFS is like to live with on a daily basis and that it is more than just fatigue for a lot of people. It can be a very debilitating illness which has stopped me from working for 1 year and in that time I have done very little socialising as well. I didn't think it was possible to actually spent so much time within the same 4 walls but I've done my best to make my room a comfortable and relaxing place.

Would be interested to see if anyone else experiences similar symptoms to me. You forget that your not alone and there are other people out there who are going through the same thing. 

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My Story

In April 2015 things changed very suddenly. I was healthy one minute enjoying a wine course at work then I began feeling like I was going to pass out. I had vertigo and my vision was out of focus, I felt nauseous and shaky. I thought it was from missing breakfast and went home to get something to eat. I still wasn't feeling better later on that day after resting. I tried to go into work a few days later, but after a few hours I felt so dizzy and light headed I had to go home again.

I felt like I'd been hit with a really bad flu but I knew that wasn't what was wrong. I was dizzy, nauseous and felt so exhausted. The weeks after this are a bit of a blur now. I visited the doctor who ran some blood tests testing my blood sugar which came back negative. So they didn't know what was wrong and to quote my doctor I was "all a bit of a mystery". I felt so convinced that there was something really wrong, I had never felt this way before. It made me furious to see how dismissive the doctors were being. I just kept dealing with these symptoms every day until my heart was racing one day and I had a temperature so ended up going to the hospital. They did more tests such as an ECG and found nothing. I now know it was most likely caused from a panic attack as I had more of them later on.

After a few months I caught an infection since my immune system is so low. I was vomiting and shaking uncontrollably one night. It was terrifying as I was staying in a hotel and had to force myself to try sleep, then had the hour long drive back home fighting the urge to throw up.  The next few weeks was the worst time of my life. I felt so unwell I couldn't even sit up; I spent all day lying in bed sleeping. I couldn't shower for days then when I did I needed help drying my hair. There were nights I would lie in bed feeling like I was going to die. I was so scared I had to ask my mum to stay with me so I could sleep. I pray that I will never be that unwell again, feeling so helpless and terrified.

I went into hospital again after a doctor came to my house and saw how unwell I had become. I lay there hoping that when they ran more tests they could tell me what was wrong. I lay in the hospital bed going between feeling like I was going to be sick to feeling like I would pass out. I could see the doctors in front of me clearly at a loss at to what to do, so after my saline drip I was sent home. I then received a call from the doctor saying that I had tested positive for Glandular Fever. I finally had a answer to what was causing me to feel so unwell. Unfortunately there is no pill or cure for Glandular Fever. The months past and I was showing little signs of improvement. I joined a new GP practice and found an understanding doctor who finally has now diagnosed me with CFS/M.E. It has been bitter sweet. I'm am so glad to finally be able to say this is what's wrong with me after not knowing for so long. Especially so I can explain to my family and friends that this is the reason why I can't work anymore and why I spend all day at home, why I have to miss birthdays. M.E isn't a quick fix and I don't know how long it'll be before I recover, I am working hard to take steps to improve my health.

What I've realised is that it takes a long time and lots of baby steps to start to recover and rebuild your strength. I have tried to push myself and inevitably I end up crashing and feeling even worse for days or weeks. I recently had one of these setbacks which has last for a few months now. It not only knocked me down physically but also it has knocked my confidence and motivation.

Currently I've started to build my strength up a little but not to the point I was at a few months ago. I've been struggling to try new things to help my recovery. It's been over a year now and I still can't believe sometimes that I went from feeling normal to being this unwell. It has changed my life and who I am as a person. There are many things I can no longer do now and it can be extremely frustrating. When people ask me how I'm feeling with myself I basically say I could not be any more fed up with the situation. This is my life just now and one day it will change again. You have to take on whatever life's throws at you and take something from it. One of the reasons why I've started this blog is in the hope that I can make something positive from this negative experience.

Nicole x

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